Passion

I'm talking on the phone with my boyfriend right now. He loves school. Literally, loves school. I don't understand how, or why, or how he even has such a drive. I guess you could say he's one of those "career oriented" kinds of people. Talking to him and listening to his drive makes me wonder what my drive is. 

Have you ever thought about it? What makes you get up in the morning? What makes each day different than the last? What is your drive to make each day a day worth living, not just another day to check off your list? 

I hate school. With everything in me, I can't understand why anyone could find it enjoyable. I guess every now and then I come across a class that I don't mind, but the homework and grades always ruin it for me. So as I ponder why I'm at school, I only think of it from the standpoint that having a degree, of any kind, will enhance the chances of me finding (as my sister would say) "a lucrative and fulfilling job." Considering that's my only reason for being in school, each day is just another day done in hopes that I got more homework done and the semester will be over so I can start my real life. 

But what will my "real life" look like? Will I actually find something to be passionate about?

Besides the story of Christ, Webster has a lot of definitions for passion, but the one that intrigues me is "a strong liking or desire for or devotion to some activity, object, or concept." 

Wow. I think the only thing I've ever been passionate about was swimming, but then I got burnt out, so now I just want to coach it. I wouldn't count that as a desire though. The only other thing I can think of is babies. Considering I don't have any, and won't for a good few years, they're rather a hard thing to be passionate about. 

Being raised going to church every Sunday, I've read and heard my share of stories about hanging out in the slums of India, or building huts in a remote village in Africa, or chilling with the homeless men under the bridge, or volunteering at a shelter...in other words, the "how to" of changing the world. I'm not really passionate about any of that though. What if all I want to do is help one girl. Be it saving her from sex trafficking, of just listening to her talk about life, all it has to be is one girl. Then maybe she'll be the one who goes out to reach the world. Sure, missions are great and I enjoy going on them, but it's not something I'd want to dedicate my life to. 

So I guess finding one girl to help navigate her way through this chaos we call life could be a passion. It doesn't matter how drastic the situation, I still want to be there to help. I don't want to think of it as a project though. More of something that happens to come along and possibly be a blessing in disguise. 

Maybe just the thought of being able to help her, whoever she may be, is my reason to get up in the morning. My reason to make today, and the next day, and the day after that, a day worth living.